Why I Don’t Believe in New Year’s Resolutions

Only 8% of people achieve their New Year’s resolutions and 92% of people fail to achieve their goals according to Forbes Magazine.

New Year’s resolutions often fail because they are rooted in excitement and past patterning rather than a sustainable strategy towards a new identity and lifestyle.

Let’s explore why I believe people struggle with New Year’s resolutions.

1. A lack of clear and specific goals.

Many resolutions are vague, like “I want to get healthy” or “I want to save money”. But without a specific plan, it’s hard to know what that success looks like. The answer is to turn resolutions into specific, measurable and time-centred goals, such as, “I’ll go to the gym three times a week or I’ll save a thousand rand a month”.

2. Unrealistic Expectations.

People often set resolutions that are too ambitious, trying to overhaul their entire life in one go in the fresh excitement of January. This can lead to burnout and feelings of failure when those resolutions are difficult to meet. A solution to this is to start small and build on incremental successes. The book “Tiny Habits” amplifies this. For example, instead of saying “I’ll lose 10 kilograms in January”, instead one can focus on “I’ll cut out sugary drinks this month”. That creates an achievable focus rather than an insurmountable and dreaded goal. Successful small steps create more sustainable long- term habits which build a new identity.

3. No plan for setbacks.

As we all know, life happens, and unexpected obstacles arise in our busy and complex lives. Many resolutions fail because people aren’t prepared for challenges. And when a challenge arises, it often derails them entirely. The empowered response is to plan for setbacks and adopt a growth mindset, a mindset that focuses on learning and progress rather than a finite destination. Understanding that slipping up doesn’t mean failure is essential for being kind to oneself, reassessing and getting back on track without flagellation and recrimination, which leads to despair.

4. Lack of emotional connection to the goal.

Resolutions are often based on external pressure rather than on our personal desires. This is critical. Without a deep understanding of our why, motivation can quickly fade. The antidote is to align your resolutions with your core values and vision, above all focusing on identity as opposed to goals. Ask yourself, “Who do I want to become, rather than, why does this goal matter to me?” Identity is the super-fuel of manifestation.

5. Reliance on motivation.

Motivation is fleeting and relying on motivation alone makes it hard to stay consistent. When the excitement of the new year fades, often so does the commitment. Conviction without commitment is just a belief, not an action. Instead, when we build habits that create a lifestyle, that builds an identity over time instead of relying on willpower. Willpower and goals can often be the judgment stick we beat ourselves with when things don’t go to plan. Identity is a long-term view. One can use strategies like habit – stacking, pairing a new habit with an existing one.

I use both habit-stacking and reward-stacking, promising yourself you will do something joyful after you’ve achieved something that you know is critical in your progress. That allows routines to become habits that stick. And habits eventually define your personal reality, and that becomes a new personality. Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about this in his wonderful book “Breaking the Habit Of Being Yourself”.

6. Focusing on the outcome alone.

Many people set goals focused only on the end result, like losing weight or earning more money, rather than the actions that are required to get there. The solution is to shift one’s focus to daily habits and systems. Patterns are key; Instead of saying, I’ll write a book, commit to writing 500 words a day. If one day that commitment gets derailed, look at it as just a bump in the road rather than a derailing of your vision.

7. Trying to do it alone.

Without accountability, it’s easy to lose focus or to quit altogether. When one builds a support system, whether it’s a friend, a mentor, or an online community, it’s a game – changer. Sharing your progress and sharing your challenges keeps you engaged on the journey of creating a new identity.

8. Starting at the wrong time.

January 1st, often feels like a fresh start, but for some people, they might be so overwhelmed that they’re not emotionally or mentally ready to commit to either big changes or small changes. Without falling into the trap of overthinking, it’s important to start when you’re ready, not because the calendar says so. Change does not need a specific starting date. What it does need is commitment and readiness to embark on embracing a new identity.

9. Resistance to change.

Habits are deeply ingrained in us. They are formed over years and decades. Breaking them requires conscious effort and an understanding of our subconscious limiting beliefs, which often causes self–sabotage. Many people underestimate just how hard it is to change their patterns. For example, if you want to eat healthier, start with small changes of adding vegetables or limiting takeaways instead of overhauling your entire diet overnight. Transformation is a journey and kindness rather than punishment are a far greater fuel for identity.

10. Lack of self-reflection.

People often set the same resolutions every year without reflecting on why they failed before. The gym is full in January and then by February, it tapers off. By March, it is the consistent gym goers who have made it part of their lifestyle. Consistency means embracing the gym as their personal reality. It has become part of their identity. It is simply who they are now.

Reflect on your past efforts and ask yourself, “What worked, what did not work, and what can I do differently?”

In summary, New Year’s resolutions don’t work because they are often treated as a one-time decision rather than an ongoing process of building new habits, new patterns, and embracing it as a journey of growth and learning. True change comes from self-awareness, intentionality, and building habits that align with who you want to become, not just what you want to achieve.

Identity is the super-fuel of manifestation. As Dr. David Hawkins says, “The unconscious will only allow us to have what we believe we deserve.”

Identity intelligence is my passion.